Here’s Trump Idiot John Eastman Trying To Get Rudy Giuliani To Help Him Overthrow Georgia

Maggie Haberman has a scoop (gift link!), everyone. She’s gotten her hands on an email your favorite brain-addled coup-plotting lawyer John Eastman sent to your other favorite brain-addled coup-plotting lawyer Rudy Giuliani, just a few hours after Joe Biden became president. It had a big idea in it, a big idea based off the zygote of a new, more manageable form of Donald Trump’s Big Lie: What if they could just overthrow Georgia?

We feel that timing is important here, because those guys had been spending every waking hour on one thing, and it was overthrowing the government in service of their weak and unpleasant-looking dear leader Trump. On that afternoon, Joe Biden was president. Those guys had lost.

To review:

January 6: Eastman and Giuliani fail at helping Trump literally end America.

January 20, noon: Joe Biden says “I do” to America.

January 20, a few hours later, Eastman emails Giuliani with an idea. One can imagine him hunched over and grunting — like he was trying to decide if he needed to go to the toilet right now or did he have time to finish this email? — as he asked Giuliani if he thought it would be a good idea for them to try to overturn the recent runoff Senate elections in Georgia.

It worked so well for the presidential!

All of this is so very fucking Underpants Gnomes:

“A lot of us have now staked our reputations on the claims of election fraud …

And we haven’t found any, oh shit!

and this would be a way to gather proof,” Mr. Eastman wrote in the previously undisclosed email, which also went to others, including a top Trump campaign adviser.

Would it, though?

“If we get proof of fraud on Jan. 5, it will likely also demonstrate the fraud on Nov. 3, thereby vindicating President Trump’s claims and serving as a strong bulwark against Senate impeachment trial.”

IF this and IF that and MAYBE ONE DAY we’ll be vindicated and then everybody will stop making fun of us and asking if somebody did a prank to us and put fentanyl in our Viagra. YOU’LL SEE!

Of course, this could be seen as a confession that they knew they didn’t have muthafuckin’ DICK in the way of actual evidence to back up their plan to overturn the election they lost because everybody despises them.

“We need to figure out how to keep up the fight,” Mr. Eastman wrote. “I’m inclined to pursue an election challenge to the Georgia runoff election, using what we already have learned (huge statistical anomalies, violations of Georgia law, etc.) as the basis. Under Georgia law, a challenge can be brought by any qualified voter, even if the candidates themselves are not interested.”

You know, since everything else has failed so far. At some point, somebody is going to make us show our work, probably. Fuck!

Then there was the part where Eastman begged Giuliani to help him get Donald Trump to pay his bill, which was $270,000. He had apparently billed the day before.

The charges included $10,000 a day for eight days of work in January 2021, including the two days before Jan. 6 when Mr. Eastman and Mr. Trump, during meetings in the Oval Office, sought unsuccessfully to pressure Vice President Mike Pence to go along with the plan to block congressional certification of the Electoral College results on Jan. 6. (Mr. Eastman appears never to have been paid.)

Welcome to Trumpworld, sir! Is this your first time here?

Haberman reminds us that Trump White House lawyer Eric Herschmann testified to the House Select Committee on January 6 that on January 7 — the morning after, in other words — Eastman came to him suggesting trying to overthrow Georgia. That was when this exchange, which should sound familiar to you by now, happened:

Mr. Herschmann said he responded that Mr. Eastman was out of his mind, adding that he told Mr. Eastman: “I only want to hear two words coming out of your mouth from now on: orderly transition.”

Mr. Herschmann, by his account, went on to tell Mr. Eastman that he should get a great criminal defense lawyer because he was going to need one.

This email comes to light as many things are happening in the various investigations into Trump’s attacks on America. We all know Eastman has been under investigation, and the feds seized his phone right out of his fanny pack phone holder earlier this summer. It’s been widely assumed for a while that Eastman’s criminal exposure here is immense.

And now, just recently, Patrick Philbin, who was a deputy White House counsel in Trump’s White House, just got a grand jury subpoena, as did big cheese Trump White House Counsel Pat Cipollone. Considering how literally nobody thinks the artist formerly known as Patsy Baloney did the coup, we are guessing that is bad fuckin’ news for the guys who actually did the coup.

When, oh when, will these people fucking go to prison?

[New York Times]

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