This is entirely too many stories for a Wonkette end of day roundup!

Tabs today was TRAINS! And some other things too!

Charlie Kirk’s incorrectly shaped head made some sounds about Taylor Swift and her child army of abortioneers.

ALL SWIFTIES WANT IS SWIFT ABORTION!

Happy congratulations to Mr. Yusef Salaam!

Justice Looks A Lot Like Exonerated 5’s Yusef Salaam Winning NYC Council Seat While Trump’s Empire Crumbles

Happy congratulations to New Jersey!

New Jersey Democrats: FUGGEDABOUTIT.

Happy congratulations to actors and people who love television and movies!

Living Hollywood Actors To Get Back To Work, Will Not Be Replaced By Dead Hollywood Actors (For Now)

Happy congratulations to our hardworking union automakers!

LIVE: How Can Joe Biden Celebrate Historic UAW Agreement While New York Times Is Still Mad At Him?

Uh oh!

Fox News’s Stupid New Bullshit: What If Joe Biden Turns Off Your Pickup On Election Day?

Here’s some corporate bullshits!

Big Data Is Selling Texts You Send From Your Car, Court Decides It’s Perfectly Fine

And LOL!

Wall Street Journal So Sad: Nobody Wants To Not Work Anymore!

Too many idiot white dudes on Fox with abortion thoughts, how is Evan supposed to keep up???

Keep Telling People What To Think About Abortion, Greg Gutfeld. You Guys Are NAILING IT.

And now for several debate thingies!

Nikki Haley’s ‘Honest’ Abortion Answer Is A Full-On Monet

What If They Had A Republican Debate And Nobody Cared?

And fuck this guy. We’re mad at him now!

Get Fucked, Dean Phillips

Well there you have it, too many stories for just one day! We should stop writing so many stories, nobody goes there anymore, it’s too crowded!